Perfection Doesn't Exist

Within I Am Not Your Perfect Mexican Daughter by Erika Sanchez, one of the major themes is this idea of the perfect Mexican daughter. The relationship between Julia, her mother, and Olga really exemplifies what Sanchez is attempting to get across about this concept of the perfect Mexican daughter - I believe. As each has their own idea of what it means to be a Mexican daughter, each person's actions differ considerably throughout the text. In the first part of the novel, Julia's mother places the role of cooking as to be an essential component of being a Mexican daughter. Her mother says, "What kind of woman are you going to be if you can't even make a tortilla?" (p. 33). This comment places all of Julia's success in being a Mexican woman/daughter on her capability of making tortillas right and ensuring that they are "nice and round" (p. 33) like Olga's always were. Through this section this also shows us the tension that is in place between Julia and Olga and how their mother views them. Olga has been propped up as this perfect Mexican daughter who is willing to stay at hom and help her parents - in addition to this she's excellent at making tortillas. Her mother also makes it known several times throughout the first part of the book that she views Olga as the "superior" daughter by consistently comparing Julia to Olga. So, this line of competition and tension is built up within Julia which complicates her process of grief and mourning for the death of her sister.

However, despite the fact that their mother views Olga as this perfect Mexican daughter - Julia is learning that that may have not been the case and we see how this image of the perfect Mexican daughter may have affected Olga. Julia says, "the only time I ever asked her [Olga] why she didn't move out or go to a real college, she told me to leave her alone in a voice so weak and brittle, I never wanted to ask her again" (p. 3).  This appears to me that Olga was potentially experiencing the exact struggle Julia is now facing - where she wants to live a certain way, but is experiencing pushback from her mother and the impact of Olga's death. This shows that both being the perfect daughter and the imperfect daughter have consequences. So, this idea of the perfect Mexican daughter definitely comes with a lot of tensions in terms of family dynamics and ideas of Julia can be this perfect daughter for her family while still remaining true to herself.

Discussion Questions:

In what other ways are Olga and Julia seen as polar opposites? Any moments where they are more alike?

What does it even mean to be a perfect Mexican daughter – according to Olga, Julia, and their mother? Is there a middle ground? Can one be an average Mexican daughter?